Jan. 9, 2023

Understanding Nate from Ted Lasso

Understanding Nate from Ted Lasso

Someone you help out that you love, who also loves you may turn on you. We've all heard the term “hurt people hurt.” The people who have hurt in them, who've experienced some sort of abuse (emotional pain or even physical pain) tend to lash out. Not everybody does that, but it's kind of like having a wound and you have to let the puss or whatever is in there come out. We live in a world where we're all interconnected. So how do we handle that kind of outburst or conflict? How do we handle that when that's us or someone we see who's needing to vent or who's needing to clear all that stuff out? How can we get rid of all that stuff from the inside, release it, and how do we deal with it when we have to deal with other people in our community? The world is our community. What one person experiences, we all experience. How do we release this hurt safe way? In today's episode, we use the character Nate from the TV series Ted Lasso to explore who we pay attention to and how to create a loving way to release hurt and pain.
https://www.ourfriendlyworldpodcast.com/


Someone you help out that you love, who also loves you may turn on you. We've all heard the term “hurt people hurt.” The people who have hurt in them, who've experienced some sort of abuse (emotional pain or even physical pain) tend to lash out. Not everybody does that, but it's kind of like having a wound and you have to let the puss or whatever is in there come out.

We live in a world where we're all interconnected. So how do we handle that kind of outburst or conflict? How do we handle that when that's us or someone we see who's needing to vent or who's needing to clear all that stuff out? How can we get rid of all that stuff from the inside, release it, and how do we deal with it when we have to deal with other people in our community? The world is our community. What one person experiences, we all experience. How do we release this hurt safe way? In today's episode, we use the character Nate from the TV series Ted Lasso to explore who we pay attention to and how to create a loving way to release hurt and pain.

https://www.ourfriendlyworldpodcast.com/

 

Transcript

Understanding Nate from Ted Lasso TRANSCRIPT

[00:00:00] Fawn: Okay. Are we ready? Yeah. No, , come

[00:00:03] Matt: on. It's early or it's late or it's

[00:00:06] Fawn: something. Hi everybody. Hello. How are you doing? What are you doing out there? Where are you? Hmm.

[00:00:14] Matt: We

[00:00:14] Fawn: had a power outage yesterday. We still kind of do. Now we have no internet, but I'm,

we're

[00:00:19] Matt: very thankful for electricity

[00:00:20] Fawn: today. We are so thankful Matt and I.

[00:00:23] Fawn: Matt and I got caught out there, .

[00:00:25] Matt: We were being stupid or

[00:00:27] Fawn: silly. Oh my God. We were so stupid, silly. We went out in a major storm. The

[00:00:33] Matt: storm was kind of over.

[00:00:35] Fawn: No, it was still, I mean, no. Yeah, the remnants of it were still here, so we had a huge power outage and it was scary. It was our first time in our new living here.

[00:00:47] Fawn: where we experienced a major storm and the lights were out normally we're prepared. Right. Normally I'm like very well.

[00:00:56] Matt: We had, we, we went without power for like 10 or 12, 14

days,

[00:01:01] Fawn: days, days. I know, and I'm usually very like the military, like I have everything set up. I know exactly where everything is.

[00:01:06] Fawn: I have hot water stored for us. But this, I've been so relaxed ever since we've settled here. , I don't know if that's good or bad, Matt. Anyway, while the kids were still sleeping and everything was still dark, we're like, let's go get them and surprise them with some hot chocolate. Yeah. And that way we can figure out does anyone have power out there in the world, or is, is it just our little area?

[00:01:30] Fawn: Anyway, we got stuck out. , all these trees were down. We didn't, I thought, we thought we could make it back because we found a way to get out of town. Not town, but like get into the major part of town. But on the way back, everything was closed off, like everything, and we couldn't get back home.

[00:01:47] Fawn: And I started to, I I, I was about to start crying. , right? Yeah. You panicked. But I was panicking. And then the police, you were like, let's just pull over and ask the police, like explain to them what we're trying to do. We were trying to get. and I'm like, I don't . Uh, no, uh, I don't, I don't because I was driving.

[00:02:06] Fawn: Right, right. I'm like, oh my God. So we, we get closer to the cop and stop picking at your stuff. Matt hurt his finger and he had to go to that doctor and now he keeps picking at it. Anyway, stop it. So what happened was I was, I think I was scared and you know, those of you who know me in person, I cannot hide my emotions.

[00:02:29] Fawn: Like you can read everything on my face. I can't hide. And so I probably looked terrified cuz I, I'm from la I'm used to like being afraid of the police. So , I think the closer we got, my eyes probably looked like humongous. Like I looked probably insane to him, like cuz I was scared to talk to him. and he's like, Hey, don't worry, I don't bite.

[00:02:55] Matt: He didn't say it like that. What did he say? He was cute. He was like, don't worry, I don't

[00:02:58] Fawn: bite. I didn't hear it like that. I did, I did not hear it like that because I'm like, okay. Cuz he was motioning for me to come closer and as I did like what, six inches and moved the car. He is like, stop. Like he yelled at me to stop my god.

[00:03:13] Fawn: What? Lord. He mercy. He's like, where do you live? ? Oh, let me guess from your perspective. He was like, he was lovely. Where do you live?

[00:03:25] Matt: Yes.

[00:03:25] Fawn: He was charming. Mm, white man. Perspective colored woman per perspective.

[00:03:31] Matt: He was lovely. He was very cute.

[00:03:32] Fawn: Oh. Anyway, so we've gone home. But I was so scared. I was like, oh no.

[00:03:39] Fawn: Even though our kids are old enough to be home alone, I, I was freaking out. I did not like being

[00:03:45] Matt: right. And as

[00:03:46] Matt: we came home, we bumped into Steve.

[00:03:49] Fawn: Yeah. Our neighbor.

[00:03:50] Matt: And Steve was like, yeah, no problem. Just, you know, I just told him where I was going and he'd let me ride through. Like it was no big

[00:03:56] Fawn: deal.

[00:03:56] Fawn: Yeah. For white. You all have no problems talking to the Popo, so let

[00:04:01] Matt: me drive next time and it'll be fine.

[00:04:04] Fawn: I didn't know we were gonna get in that mess. We kept driving and driving, trying to find a labyrinth of different ways to possibly get to our place and nothing, nothing. Anyway, I digress. Oh, yes, you, why did I start talking about

[00:04:18] Matt: this?

[00:04:18] Matt: I, I, I merely discussed we lost power and so you went into the diatribe that you went into anyway.

[00:04:24] Fawn: Yeah, so, so thank. So thankful. But anyway, still lots of people without power, there's definitely no internet, nothing. So it's nice actually, I, I had a relaxing day yesterday, aside from panicking about not being able to make it home anyway.

[00:04:46] Fawn: Ha.

[00:04:47] Fawn: So one of the things I did yesterday was lots of reflection. . Mm-hmm. . And there's some, I al I've always wondered about this with, of course with friendship, but like all, all relationships in general. So I started playing shows in my head that are one of my favorites and one of them is Ted Lasso, I swear.

[00:05:09] Fawn: Wait,

[00:05:09] Matt: you have history now with Jason Sudeikis?

[00:05:11] Fawn: Oh my God. I reached out to him on Instagram when, when his, when he was on Instagram and, and I'm pretty sure, I'm pretty certain. It was really him. Yeah. Um, anyway, , but I just, I love that show so much. It was Ted Lasso and a few other shows that totally saved our lives during the pandemic when we were totally scared.

[00:05:35] Fawn: The world was insane, horrible. Ted Lasso got us through. The characters are so rich and they did such a great job diving in deep and delving into each individual person and their personalities? Well,

[00:05:50] Matt: the people feel a lot more realized than in a lot of other cases. I mean, typically it's like the main characters are very actualized, but then the side characters aren't given a lot of meat.

[00:06:01] Matt: They're basically just there for the main character to

[00:06:04] Fawn: play off of. But in this case, that's not true.

[00:06:07] Matt: Correct.

[00:06:07] Fawn: Every character is rich and I just wanna see the show over and over and over again to understand all the clues that I missed before. Right. Because you can't pay attention to everything at the same time.

[00:06:19] Fawn: I can't. Anyway, you can.

[00:06:21] Matt: No, no, no. Abs absolutely. You do that. A character like Higgins, who you find out is like, he totally, which one was Higgins? He is the communications manager. Oh, okay. Yeah. And so he has a family. He wants to be a, didn't he like play the bass? Like he totally went down the beatnik route there for a second when he got like laid off.

[00:06:39] Matt: I mean, he's literally completely just foil kind of character, but there he is.

[00:06:45] Fawn: And one of his sons is a priest on the show. ,

[00:06:48] Matt: right? Yes. Yes. Because they have a nasty habit of cursing or something in front of him, right. . Anyways, but yes, that's just, that's just

[00:06:55] Fawn: for example. But I, um, I was talking to Wendy about this and she had the same reaction.

[00:07:02] Fawn: I did like the sheer terror of the very last second of the very last episode that we've seen, that we've seen, which was. Nate, the great, oh my goodness, that was scary. Like to see Nate, who's a very lovable character that's abused or has abuse in his past, emotional

[00:07:24] Matt: abuse. So Nate starts the series off by being basically the water boy.

[00:07:30] Matt: and dealing with the abuse that the water boy gets. And they eventually kind of elevate him to an assistant coach and they have him make a, a couple of interesting calls and then he leaves the club and it looks like he becomes the head coach at another club.

[00:07:46] Fawn: Oh, you just gave it away, Matt. Well, some people haven't seen it.

[00:07:49] Matt: You know what? Welcome to spoilers. You know, you can't spoil something that's been out over a year.

[00:07:54] Fawn: Okay, but here's the thing. A long time ago, someone who went to a lot of therapy, and had younger siblings, told me that her therapist said that when someone you help out that you love, who also love you will turn on you, like you have to expect that, that they will turn on you.

[00:08:21] Fawn: And I never understood, like she had a very bizarre outlook on life, this person. But most of the things she said, it was a person I worked with at a design studio. Most of the stuff she said was like, pretty interesting, you know, like, it, it wasn't totally wrong, , some of the things she said was wrong, wrong, wrong,

[00:08:41] Fawn: But, but, um, this one, I don't know. This one I've always thought about. I'm like, is that true? I don't know. When someone is hurt, you know, we've all heard the term hurt people hurt. Right, right. The people who have hurt in them, who are abused or who are experiencing emotional pain or even physical pain mm-hmm.

[00:09:07] Fawn: they tend to lash out. Not everybody, not everybody does that, but it's kind of like having a wound and you have to let the puss or whatever is in there come out. Right, right. Matt's pointing to his finger cause oh my God, he hurt his How is that doing? Cuz you keep messing with it again.

[00:09:26] Fawn: It's

[00:09:27] Matt: totally much better. But no, when, when, um, so it was all swelled up and the doctor like, totally gave like a, I swear to God it's, it was like a quarter inch gash on it and she squeezed out all the pus. I was. Very painful,

[00:09:41] Fawn: but you have anyway, to get that stuff out, you gotta get that stuff

[00:09:44] Matt: out. Yes.

[00:09:45] Matt: Emotion, emotionally, if it's, I dunno if you should have had as much glee as my doctor had, but Yes. , she had glee. She had glee. She was like, oh, it's like popping a pimple. Ew. Yeah. It was pretty disgusting. Anyways. Oh my God. That's beside the point anyway.

[00:09:58] Fawn: Yes. Non sequiter. So I'm thinking, I'm trying to remember where Nate started to go wrong.

[00:10:06] Fawn: I'm like, I think remember when he had a taste of letting it go, like expressing his true emotions and being free to say whatever he wanted to say. Remember, it was, I think, in the middle of the whole show where Ted Lassos, Ted lasso Ted. Said, I want you to say all this stuff to, to the whole crew. To the

[00:10:29] Matt: team.

[00:10:30] Matt: Oh, right. He writes down stuff for Ted and then Ted's like, this is perfect. You tell him, he

[00:10:34] Fawn: basically roasts every single player and he's not nice. He's just like, you know, you, I don't remember the things. He

[00:10:44] Matt: was accurate. and he was honest. Mm-hmm. . And he, at the same time, he was funny. Yes, I remember that.

[00:10:50] Matt: And him being granted that ability, as you know, as you're about to say, him being granted that ability and granted that freedom to do that might have been the beginning of his dissent into

[00:11:00] Fawn: darkness. Right, right. Like letting it out, like everything he's held in. All the abuse he got from his dad, the not being loved or respected by his dad or anyone else around him being ignored for so long.

[00:11:16] Fawn: Finally, it was released and it, it was like it was a slow building kind of explosion of dark things to come out. Mm-hmm. . Anyway, what I'm saying is we all live in a world where we're all interconnected. So how do we handle that? How do we handle that when that's us? Who's doing that?

[00:11:37] Fawn: Who's needing to vent or who's needing to vomit all that stuff out? You know, take, get rid of all that stuff from the inside, like, release it and how do we deal with it when we have to deal with other people in our community, with the world is our community that need to expel that stuff. How can we do it in a safe manner?

[00:12:01] Fawn: How can we do it in, um, Gentle manner. I don't know if it'll be gentle. Sometimes

[00:12:06] Matt: a controlled manner

[00:12:08] Fawn: is what you're looking for and that you can't control it because it's about emotion. No,

[00:12:12] Matt: that's true. The person who's expressing can't control it. The people around that person need to be understanding and in control, and

[00:12:21] Fawn: that's why art is so important in society because that's one way you can do it.

[00:12:26] Fawn: Mm-hmm. , you can express yourself through song, through paintings, through sculpture, through, I don't know, any kind of art form. It's one way where you can totally be free in being able to release all that stuff in a safe way. Right, right. Without harming someone else. Typically , yeah, ab,

[00:12:46] Matt: absolutely.

[00:12:47] Matt: And there's also, God, what was it? I God, I just saw something about this, but I think they called it like a rage cage or something. Hmm. Which is one of these places you go into and you break stuff.

[00:12:58] Fawn: It's called a rage cage. Yeah. You, I was watching some cooking

[00:13:01] Matt: show. That's right. I was watching some weird cooking contest show Hell's Kitchen.

[00:13:05] Matt: I think it might have been because, I was watching it. I'm not a huge fan, but I was watching it and one of the rewards was they let all the chefs go to this place called the Rage Cage and like they were like taking sledgehammers to toilets and things. So it's like the next evolution. Cuz there was this thing I remember hearing about where you got to break pottery and then you, you got stuff to make mosaics with mm-hmm.

[00:13:29] Matt: So literally it was like break and fix. Mm-hmm. . But like you were breaking dishes and things and this is like next level.

[00:13:35] Fawn: Right? Hold on.

[00:13:39] Fawn: Huh, that's better. I had to move the mic. Okay. So, alright. I guess that's it. Problem solved .

[00:13:45] Matt: Well, no, no, no. Um, but that's just it. I think there's a lot to it. First thing, of course, is you have to realize maybe there's, there's a problem and it's, it's deep-seated. I think in dealing with it though, you also have to think of yourself as being like a parent with a, an infant who's in pain.

[00:14:04] Matt: I've always said

[00:14:04] Fawn: that. I know you stole that from me.

[00:14:07] Matt: You stole that from me.

[00:14:08] Fawn: Oh my God, Matt. No, .

[00:14:11] Matt: See, now I have to be the parent. It's okay. Excuse

[00:14:13] Fawn: me. It's okay. Oh hell no. It's Matt. It's okay. Matt. Shut up. . Matt. Hey, you all can go back to the previous episodes from when we began. It was I, I was the one who was saying all this.

[00:14:26] Fawn: That's my theory. Good Lord. You make me mad. Go on. What were you saying Anyway? Yeah. Anyways,

[00:14:33] Matt: we, and the, the trick is, is paying attention and you know, honestly in inside of the show, like Ted Lasso, obviously they need drama. They need to create some element of conflict. So it's important to not recognize for the people around him, to not see him evolving, devolving, whatever you want to call

[00:14:52] Fawn: it, into him.

[00:14:53] Fawn: As in Nate. Nate,

[00:14:54] Matt: the Great. Yeah. Nate, Nathan. , you know, watching his character arc change in the course of time. They, they, because

[00:15:02] Fawn: there's a lot of, there's no show, there's a lot of assuming and, and that, and that's perfect that it's, that's brilliant because yeah, people who are quiet and who take care of everyone else, they go under the radar.

[00:15:12] Fawn: And we don't think to ourselves, oh, this person could be hurting or this person, right? This person's squared away. We don't have to worry. Let's, let's pay attention to this person, right? Mm-hmm. ,

[00:15:23] Matt: you know, he got, he got his strokes like, oh my God, you reme. He, the first episode, he's like, oh my God, you remembered my name.

[00:15:29] Matt: Right? And he was so happy because nobody even bothered to remember his name. Right.

[00:15:36] Fawn: Ouch. I mean, and this gets scary, but like, when you hear about people who do terrible things and the people around them get interviewed, like people in the neighborhood. . And the common thing is, oh, they were always so quiet.

[00:15:51] Fawn: Were they quiet or did you ignore them? Right. And assume nothing about them.

[00:15:57] Matt: Right, right. And did you not try and draw them out or,

[00:16:04] Fawn: mm-hmm. . Yeah. It's bizarre. I mean, just moving here to this beautiful area. The more you get to know people, the more you understand. Even though everything seems to be copacetic, there's been lots of, drama, drama and like there's been miscommunication and people get upset over trees or whatever it is.

[00:16:33] Fawn: And

[00:16:34] Matt: there's been downright lies and there's been, you know Right. People

[00:16:37] Fawn: fight and for years too. Yeah. It's something that happens all the time. And this is part of the key things in friendships and relationships is to acknowledge all this. And you could say, well, I don't have time for that.

[00:16:51] Fawn: But what happens when things get so out of control? You have to make time for that. It's like raising children again, because you can say, I don't have time for that, or I don't have the energy for it. But you have to, you have to stop everything and pay attention. Be present, and we have to do that with everybody, and that's one of the benefits and the downfalls of living in a society.

[00:17:18] Fawn: The benefit is that we are truly helping each other out. Like the power went out. We were all scared inside and there were things banging around everywhere. And when the power went out, there were explosions we could see of light and live wires on the ground and sparks. And, you know, when we went out with the car, we saw these topple trees over power lines.

[00:17:45] Fawn: We saw one of those big, big. Things that hold the power lines that just fell and was, blocking the whole highway. But like, look at all the people who stepped in and knew what to do. Experts on every level, removing things, handling electricity, knowing exactly what to do so we can be warm and have power in our little homes.

[00:18:09] Fawn: It's amazing. Now, if I had to do that on my own. , we'd be living with nothing. , I don't know how electricity works.

[00:18:19] Matt: We, we'd have a solar oven, maybe

[00:18:21] Fawn: how there was no sun out. And how do we even make a solar oven? I don't know. Mirrors . How do you make a mirror Matt? Do you know what I'm saying? Everybody has a purpose and everybody has their techniques of their knowledge of

[00:18:38] Fawn: how to make life beautiful. Right? So those are the benefits. And the other side is, it is our obligation with all these benefits to look out for one another and to pay attention to one another,

[00:18:53] Matt: right? Yes. Yes. And it's, but it's also our obligation to realize when we're in a place where we need help to find it.

[00:19:02] Matt: Yes.

[00:19:06] Matt: because there is findable help out there. Huh? But now

[00:19:11] Fawn: if you wanna s Well, you know what? We can't leave it out there. Like there's findable help out there. Well, what do you mean by that, Matt? Like, give me some examples for me when you say that. I think. Okay. When I'm scared. or I'm distraught.

[00:19:25] Fawn: I will call up someone I know.

[00:19:27] Matt: Yes.

[00:19:27] Fawn: And tell them I'm distraught. I'm scared, I don't know what to do.

[00:19:31] Matt: Yep.

[00:19:31] Fawn: And they may not know, so I go to another person. Right. But I keep asking for help, you know, like, um, like I and you, you would be surprised that you're actually watched, people are curious. So people are, Like, we moved into this neighborhood and we found out people were watching.

[00:19:51] Fawn: Every time I've been out in the yard not knowing, thinking to myself, I don't know what to do with this. Like, I, I don't understand nature and there's a yard that I'm now taking care of. I don't know. I swear almost every time a friend Kathy comes over and helps me. and I'm so thankful, because I really don't know what I'm doing.

[00:20:12] Fawn: Right. Do you know what I'm saying? Mm-hmm. , or I was looking at the spigot outside. I'm like, oh my God, the deep freeze is coming. I don't know what to do with the spigot. I don't know. And like she came over and she told us what to do. Now we couldn't figure out what to do cause we couldn't figure it out in the house.

[00:20:26] Fawn: Like we couldn't figure out where the valve was to turn off the water. , but I figured it out. But it was because I had some of the burden lifted off my shoulders because I knew someone cared and she was genuinely trying to help me, even though we didn't find the solution that loving kindness of trying to help me even though we didn't reach the resolve allowed me

[00:20:51] Fawn: to find it on my own. What I ended up doing was I took one of the mittens that belonged to El and Allegra when they were babies, . I put those mittens like they're waterproof for snow, for playing in the snow. I put those over the water spigot outside the house, so it looks like there's a baby hand sticking out of the side of the house.

[00:21:11] Fawn: There's two of. Oh, but you know, , I, I fixed it.

Well,

[00:21:16] Matt: hopefully, yes, yes. But that's just it, you know, go looking for help, and you should be able to find something. At the lowest, highest level, there's state agencies, certainly, but there's also, it, it depends on how much or how little help you need.

[00:21:32] Matt: Sometimes it's just somebody being kind. Mm. Or sometimes it's you performing a service for someone else. And

[00:21:40] Fawn: here's the thing, if more people do this, the easier it is to just get that help naturally from like going to get a cup of coffee and having someone be kind to you or like, you see magical things, loving things happen all the time and they happen for you.

[00:21:55] Fawn: You're able to see that. But when we don't do that, when we all don't do that as much, then everybody's hurting and everybody's grumpy and everybody's in so much pain that it becomes a very negative society that you feel like the majority of things out there are bad, that people are mean, but really it is quite the opposite because people do care.

[00:22:24] Fawn: I think listening to the news, and especially the past few years, the amount that we're exposed to, the amount of things that have been happening the past few years. It's really, and, and then also the war that's going on within the media, this side versus this other side, right. Dividing us even further than we were divided before.

[00:22:50] Fawn: I think it just makes the whole thing even more un, un untreatable, like, well,

[00:22:56] Matt: they certainly give, they, they, it seems like the media are fond of presenting problems and no solutions, and unfortunately, if they can do that for 24 hours a day, seven days a week and never provide any solutions, it starts to feel like there are no solutions.

[00:23:15] Matt: whereas the solutions really are talk, see people as people and figure out h how people are hurting and how you can help,

[00:23:24] Fawn: or, you know, you don't even have to go looking for people who are hurting. But just like being present for one another is pretty effortless and once you start doing it, you're like, oh my God, that was amazing.

[00:23:38] Fawn: Like, I barely, it barely takes any effort. Like I always say, you would be surprised what A little smile, a genuine smile. Like the, not the ones where you just stretch your lips and show your teeth. No, a genuine smile. You'd be surprised what that can do. Baby. Step number one, . You know, then the other baby step would be saying hello, and then when you ask them how they're doing, actually standing there and waiting.

[00:24:08] Fawn: To actually hear a response, a real one, how are you?

[00:24:16] Fawn: And then if they come back with, um, a generic "fine," pushing it a little bit further and maybe asking a question about them or maybe commenting on, something that's beautiful about them that day. Any little thing that will let the person know that you see them, that they matter.

[00:24:36] Fawn: Right? That's all it takes. You don't have to find the cure to cancer . Do you know what I'm saying? Right.

[00:24:43] Matt: And and honestly, in the process of doing that, you generally feel better too.

[00:24:48] Fawn: Yeah. Because you realize how easy it is and like how fun it is to connect with someone when you make that connection, even if it's for a split second, you never see the person again,

[00:24:58] Fawn: it is. It is. It is amazing. It's you. It is. You get such a high, you. . It's so true. You get so happy and giddy like yippeee1. It's really interesting as opposed to the other way around, like when someone cuts you off or like you are mean to each other, you end up walking life constantly replaying the person that cut you off or the person that called you this horrible name.

[00:25:30] Fawn: Right. Anyway. I used to have, so I used to live in LA. So did Matt. This is before I met you, Matt. Have I told you this? So I would be, coming home from work or going to work. I was always stuck in traffic. Even on the 4 0 5, the freeway, like it was like a parking lot. So you'd be on the freeway.

[00:25:51] Fawn: You're supposed to be like going 60 miles an hour. You're like standing still for a long time. So what I started to do was I got several different bicycle bells that were inside the car , and sometimes I would take one of them, like whatever I felt like having as the sound for that particular moment. And I would take it in my hand and take it outside of the car door, where the window is.

[00:26:20] Fawn: Mm-hmm. , where the, uh, window where you can see the traffic on the side, the side window. What is it called? The side mirror. And I would ring it like I don't have it with me. Is there one here? You know, like a bicycle bell, right? Those old school bicycle bells. And I would ring it and on the freeway because everybody's standing still.

[00:26:43] Fawn: And it's kind of like people have their windows down, maybe, you know, like. and they hear this bicycle bell on the freeway, like as you're staying . Right. So, and people started looking around and then some, some people started laughing, and then sometimes I had one of those Groucho Marks ones, those honky ones, Hong Kong, you know those big bulbus?

[00:27:04] Fawn: Yes. Black, the black ball that you squeeze, you know? Mm-hmm. with a, anyway, why am I saying this? I totally. Just stuff like that.

[00:27:15] Matt: Well, it, it's a way of making connection, getting stuck in traffic a little more enjoyable. Yeah. And connecting with

[00:27:21] Fawn: people. And you know what, once I was asked out on a date on the freeway as we were stuck on the 4 0 5

[00:27:30] Fawn: Oh dear. He was cute too. Uh, but anyway, you can have connections anywhere, guys. It's fun. It's. It could just be a little glance. That's it. Anyway, I feel like we've said this before, but in different ways. Right. So anything else to add? Look out for the Nates. Sometimes we're all Nates.

[00:27:54] Matt: Sometimes, yeah, sometimes we're dwelling in a place we shouldn't be dwelling and we need somebody to help lift us out.

[00:28:01] Fawn: And sometimes there are not. Sometimes, and there's signs everywhere. Like I remember there was this, outdoor mall we would go to in Boulder. There was this guy who did yoga, this older man, he totally looked like a yogi from India, skinny, like tall, very flexy. and before he started his shows like his shows were just like, he would do these maneuvers, like turn himself into a pretzel.

[00:28:31] Fawn: But the way he started his shows cracked me up and I started to take his line and say it all the time when I felt like I was a Nate. So he would start off the show by saying, pay attention to me.

[00:28:48] Fawn: nice. Hello. Pay attention to me. Pay attention to me. And people would, with, with graciousness, like, like all excited, like, oh, okay. Like they didn't know what was happening. It was just this one man. Right. just standing there, no props, nothing. Just his body like saying, pay attention to me, nice and and then he would start the show.

[00:29:09] Fawn: It was brilliant. I'm like, yeah, pay attention to me, . That's it. Thank you for paying attention to us. Love you guys so much. Talk to you in a few days. Be well. Bye.